I stopped making my hair pretend to be blonde because freedom or something.
When you take longer than 4 seconds to say your coffee order, everyone behind you is making this face behind your back. FACT.
You guys I won my first pageant!!
Just a hint at half of what I want for my birthday(ON WEDNESDAY). Still searching for a perfect pic of a cheeseburger with a candle in it.
Get the fuck outta here if you don’t think macarooooons are fucking precious.
“I don’t need this shit to be radiant I need it to absorb blood!” -I said out loud, alone in the tampon isle.
Pretty stoked to have spent half the year with this guy and 7 years with this little weirdo.
The excitement of winning bunco can make you forget English.
Hey all you assholes! Listen up. @elliotbabin made a really good record called Dad Punchers. Buy it or forever be called a doodypants.
